Look at this child.
This sign is from a bus company and talks about kids taking their
identification card with them when they travel to combat kidnapping. Who in their right mind would kidnap this
kid? He looks like he’s going to kill me
in my sleep. And even look at his ID
photo. If that soulless stare doesn’t
make your amygdala squirm, nothing will.
It’s like Hitler’s baby photo.
This lady doesn’t work here.
Also, it’s 40 degrees out. Sorry
you got your hopes up.
A Peruvian favorite is to put useless quotation marks around
things, especially names. A favorite of
mine in Carhuamayo is Botica “Jhire.” In
Spanish, j’s make an h sound, and h’s are silent. I know, hold onto your hat. I think they put the quotation marks around
it so you have to take a pause to appreciate the pronunciation. This one has me stumped, though.
The marks aren’t around a proper noun. Is it not really a bathroom? Is this some sort of South American hipster
irony? Good god, I just want to know if
I can pee in there or not!
Then, there’s this little man on the side of an ice cream
cooler.
Why is he so inexplicably upset
about his awesome cowboy outfit, physics defying hat, and giant chocolate ice
cream cone? Furthermore, why on earth
would you put such an unhappy child on your cooler? My hypothesis is that the hat and ice cream
were photoshopped in. It’s actually just
a small boy in part of a cowboy outfit, maybe being told his cat died.
Lastly, some totally bewildering graffiti.
Rather than just lacking mastery of the English language, I like to think that this graffiti artist has a tyrannosaurus friend named Chomp, of whom he has a high opinion.
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